Whim or Interest? Committing to an Activity

I like to encourage kids and adults to try out new things. You never know what you have a knack for until you’ve actually tried it and worked on it long enough to see if you can be successful with it. No one is an expert at something on the first attempt, after all.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve joined a gym. The first few weeks I looked forward to the new experience and took a bit of pride in my goal of losing weight and becoming fit. Then, the trips to the gym suddenly got inconvenient. There was always something else I had to do. Soon, the gym bag was in the back of the closet.

This has happened with book clubs, ceramic classes, and even continuous learning classes. But, I told myself, I’m a big girl and can make my own decision on what is a right fit for me and my schedule.

As a mom, I tend to look at the situation a bit differently when a child decides that they want to drop out of an activity. I think that kids should finish what they start. I feel that it helps with their self discipline. It’s one of those parenting “Do as I say, not as I do” type of things.

Now that I thing about it, I’m not being fair at all. How successful can I be at encouraging someone to try something new if I attach a rule that they have to stick it out even if they don’t like it?

Kids often come up with ideas for new things they want to try all on their own. Most of them cost the parents a lot of money and time spent driving them to the activity. Many times the child wants to try the activity because they saw it on the TV, heard about it at school, or several of their friends are involved.

If you face the same dilemma, talk it over with your child. Listen as they explain their reason for wanting to join the activity. Discuss the schedule and cost with the child. Explain that if they add the new activity to their schedule, it may cause a conflict with other things. If you both agree that the new experience is worth trying, define a trial period. Let the child know that you expect him to commit to the new activity until the end of the trial and at that time you will discuss it again to see if they should continue with the activity.

If the child wants to quit the activity before the end of the trial period, try to find out why? Is it just that he doesn’t feel successful? Is there a personality conflict with other members or leaders of the group? Did he just get tired of it?

Sometime there is a good reason for kids to drop an activity. Sometimes the only reason is that they’ve found something else they want to try. But as a mom you know you can’t keep investing time on money on a passing whim. Use your own judgment as to whether you’ll allow the child to drop out before the trial period ends.

You’re the mom, he’s your child. You are the best person to make the decision.